Five ways to help your parents downsize

There are several tell-tale signs over the years that will suggest your parents are coming closer to the time when they can no longer live comfortably in the family home.

The garden might go untendered, the leaves might stay in the pool, the guttering is clogged, or your parents find it hard to get up and down the stairs.

Tackling the topic of downsizing can be difficult and requires gentle, diplomatic language. The idea of leaving the family home and throwing out possessions accumulated over a lifetime is unthinkable to many in their advanced years.

They’ll have their habits and will likely be comfortable in their familiar surroundings. But that doesn’t mean that it’s not time for your parents to start thinking about downsizing to something smaller that’s easier to maintain, has lifestyle benefits, or even moving to a retirement village.

As an experienced neighborhood agent, I’ve helped many clients in the position where they need to convince their parents that it’s time to leave the family home and let go of the responsibilities that come with it.

Below are five recommendations for how you might approach the topic. Of course, every family situation is different and these are general guidelines only, but I trust they are useful. 

  1. Communicate openly – Be empathetic but stay positive about the idea. Downsizing is about creating space for new adventures, or to explore new hobbies. You’ll find this a more successful approach than telling them the stairs have become too steep, or they’re too old to maintain the garden.
  2. Ask questions – Listen to your parents’ concerns. You might find they’re reluctant because they’re unsure of the process, the financial impact, or they fear the upheaval that goes with downsizing. Often, folks are scared of losing their independence. Emphasize how this makes them more independent rather than less.
  3. Be patient – This is not a one-conversation topic. It would be best if you gave your parents time to get used to the idea. That might be several months, even a year or so. If you’re lucky enough, you might sit down with your parents and make a five-year plan on how they should transition from the family home.
  4. Explore alternatives – Work with your parents to see what alternative accommodation makes sense. Is it wise to move to a smaller house, an apartment, or would they feel happier going into a retirement complex now?
  5. Seek advice – Work with your parents’ financial planner or accountant, as well as a trusted real estate agent, to look at the array of options available. Financial security will be fundamental, of course. They will feel more reassured if you secure the buy-in of professionals.

If you’d like to discuss a plan of action for your parents and how we can maximize the value of the family home to give them a comfortable retirement, I’d be more than happy to assist.