Selling your home can be stressful even when the process is well organised and proceeding as expected. There’s a lot going on at a psychological level that can make you feel deeply uncomfortable even when things are under control. Let’s take a look at why you might be feeling unsettled and how to reduce the anxiety:
It’s common to feel anxious
Shelter is one of our basic needs. This means that when we humans feel our “shelter” is uncertain, it feels like our very survival is threatened. It also affects our sense of safety and security. Selling a property is to walk headlong into these feelings of anxiety and distress that often refuse to be reasoned away.
Stress can affect decision making
Research from the University of Pittsburgh has identified that anxiety disrupts the decision-making regions of our brains. This means it can be physically impossible to think clearly in some highly stressful situations, which in turn is likely to affect your behaviour and make it hard to understand the consequences of risk or to manage problem-solving. It also affects our ability to regulate our emotions.
Noticing when you feel stressed and recognising this is how you feel is an extremely important part of managing the anxiety. Having a plan for how to handle yourself when you’re feeling this way is also very powerful.
1. Have a wingman. There can be times when there is so much running through your head that you literally can’t think. This is when it helps to have the support of an experienced wingman – someone who has seen it all before and knows exactly what to do.
2. Foretold is forearmed. Selling – or buying – a property is something many others have done before you. And one your agent has experienced many times. Ask your agent for help to understand the process and all its steps in detail before you start and where things commonly go wrong. If you know where the pain points are likely to be, you’ll have a plan made in advance for how you will solve issues – you won’t have to think it through while you’re under stress.
3. Schedule breaks from the stressors. What is the most stressful thing about the sale process for you? Is it having the property clean? Is it making sure the dog is out of the house? Is it juggling the kids and their normal weekend routines while you have an open?
Selling a home is an extraordinary time. It’s okay to ask for help. Speak to your agent to see if they have any services they can offer that can help you with cleaning and maintenance. Ask parents or friends to assist with the kids or pets. You don’t have to do it all yourself.
Now would also be a good time to have a regular massage or some kind of ‘me-time’ planned – even if it’s just a cup of coffee with a friend or some time at the gym.
4. Be mindful. The saying “This too shall pass” has been around for millennia and is well proven. Rather than focus on the anxiety of what is in front of you, try to visualise what the end result both looks like and feels like in a positive way. This can be hugely powerful to reducing stress. Think about exciting it will be once you know how much money is coming in from the sale. Imagine how lovely your new home is going to be. Focus on all the things you will be able to achieve when you move into the new chapter of your life.
And don’t forget to breathe!